Get Your Dirty On With Colorado's First Cookie Dealers | Hit us up on text 24/7

Call | Text 720-869-3669 to get Dirty 24/7

THE DIRTY ISLANDER FUDGE CO.
THE DIRTY ISLANDER FUDGE CO.
  • Home
  • Shop
  • Menu
  • Custom Orders
  • Dirt on US
  • Terms and Conditions
  • More
    • Home
    • Shop
    • Menu
    • Custom Orders
    • Dirt on US
    • Terms and Conditions

Call | Text 720-869-3669 to get Dirty 24/7

  • Sign In
  • Create Account

  • Orders
  • My Account
  • Signed in as:

  • filler@godaddy.com


  • Orders
  • My Account
  • Sign out


Signed in as:

filler@godaddy.com

  • Home
  • Shop
  • Menu
  • Custom Orders
  • Dirt on US
  • Terms and Conditions

Account


  • Orders
  • My Account
  • Sign out


  • Sign In
  • Orders
  • My Account

Gourmet Cookies

MIP

Mum, I'm Preggo (MIP) [New York Style Choc-chip]

$5

Concept: An ooey gooey dough of rich buttery goodness knocked up heavily with the most exquisite of melt-in-your-mouth chocolate chunks and chips. Mum would (not) approve! This cookie monstrosity would amp up any occasion, whether it’s a pity party, divorce jollifications, celebrating the sublime child-free life or an unexpected baby shower - or just inhale the hell out of them (alone) because you’re a ferocious believer in the significance of the ideology: ‘size matters’! 

BEC

Black Eye Concussion (BEC) [Blueberry Shortcake]

$5

Visualize getting punched in the face with flavours so temptingly pompous that your very first impulse is to pray - yes, pray you get punched excruciatingly hard again and again. And again. The zing of zesty gooey shortcake in cahoots with succulent blueberries might get you caught aggressively finger licking. But hey, we’re not judging. 

LMJ

Lost My Job but whateva (LMJ) [Peanut Butter loaded with PB Cups]

$5

The LMJ provides not just peanut-buttery comfort to the hopeless and downtrodden but it ignites a chocolaty flame in your disillusioned belly (and disgruntled psyche) to rise like a Phoenix from the ashes! Oozing with Peanut Butter Cups, this cookie will tantalize your tastebuds as well as your spirit to go ahead, be afraid, and DO IT ANYWAY. 

WOW

Worst Of The Worst (WOW) [Secret-Ingredient Choc Chip]

$5

Trigger warning: This is NOT your grandma’s age-old, simple-and-safe choc-chip cookie. This b*tch is wicked. Packed with secret ingredients, this covert choc-chip demon is beyond horrendously bad. You’ll get hooked... and so will your grandma. Angelically light but viciously addictive, you’ll OD on this - and survive - only to relive the experience over and over (and over). Cookiegasms are a thing. Thank (or curse) us later. 


BRE

Big Richard Energy (BRE) [GF Monster]

$5

Best gluten-free dessert. EVER.   *Mic drop*

An absolute monstrosity with the power of changing lives. Silky creamy PB collides with chewy oats to create a fit abomination packed with premium chocolate chunks and candy. This flavor baby will leave you thinking “gluten-free” may be the best lifestyle choice you ever made. 

PS: You won't be the same after tasting it. Trust. 

Amish Pornstar (AP) [Soft Sugar]

$5

Simple but Sexy, Modest but Revealing, Conservative yet Progressive, this modern take on a timeless classic will compel you to shuck the shackles of tradition and follow your deepest inhibitions to go WILD. This soft buttery sugary goodness will have you fully satisfied but you also keep your dignity so you can look yourself in the mirror tomorrow and not have chocolate all over your face. BUYER BEWARE: One might not be enough so ordering multiple is STRONGLY ADVISED 

churro cookie

Mexican Foreplay (MF) [Churro exterior with Hazelnut Filling]

$5

Imagine a risqué encounter that bawls an eccentric gratification so implicitly adrenalizing, it just makes you put a sock in it! The mouth-watering hazelnut filling erotically enveloped in this flirtatiously crumbly churro biscuit will leave you shrieking with electric feelings one could only hope to concoct in a provocatively raunchy hallucination. Oof, could it get any steamier?! Nope, it cannot (in case you were wondering). 


Freud’s Unicorn Fantasy

Freud’s Unicorn Fantasy (FUF) [Fruity Citrus Crunch]

$5

Feed your improper appetites and let loose your roguish inner child - finally. With citrus notes to fuel your libido and a soft chewy center to massage your ego, this dreamy treat is loaded with your fave childhood cereal transporting you back to more indecent times! Also, the deliciously crispy exterior is less overt than your Oedipus Complex!


Still don’t understand the flavor profile? Imagine what Freud’s dreams would taste like. 

Iowa Cowboy (IC) [Everything but the cowboy]

$5

Inspired by our heroic, ultra-masculine brother Joey who is characterized by a charming machismo that inhabits a soft, sensitive-yet-fierce protective side, lead us to create this one-of-a-kind strapping celebration of our brother in cookie form. A robust snack, the IC is well fortified with rich chocolate, unapologetically-crispy cornflakes, hints of toasted shredded coconut, potent homemade PB and a manful of crunchy oats laced with volcanic Iowa pride. This treat is the ULTIMATE STUD. 

caramel cookie

Caramel Hickey (CH) [Salted Caramel With A Choc Surprise]

$5

Salted caramel just got a lofty upgrade with this absurdly soft cookie with a rush of a chocolate job. Best of success not melting in love at first lick! 

Haters Gonna Love (HGL) [Choc-Chip with toffee]

$5

If you're a hater (or want to convert one), these chocolate chip supremacies are for you. With the grandeur of our most expensive chocolate and majestic homemade toffee, a gift of these could turn any vile hater into an obsessively compulsive lover. True Story.

half brownie half chocolate chip cookie

Road Rage (RR) [Half Brownie/ Half Choc-Chip]

$5

1/2 brownie + 1/2 half choc-chip cookie= 1 bad mother f******

Toffee gourmet cookies

Interracial Stimulation (IS) [Toffee sunk in Milk & Dark Choc]

$5

Brace yourselves right about now ‘coz these sensuously gourmet creatures are bulging with blatantly brown butter, golden toffee, voluptuous white chocolate and intensely delectable dark chocolate that will thrill you from the inside out. Just don’t blame us if your tongue gets overly rapacious.  And now you’re thinking of googling that word!

raspberry white chocolate cookies

Grope Me In Public (GMIP) [Raspberry White Chocolate]

$5

Lightly tender and densely seductive, the GMIPs will seize your spirit with such belligerent tenacity that you might need to regain control of your sensibilities. The superbly rich white chocolate‘s intimate affair with illegitimately juicy raspberries might leave you slightly unhinged. But it’ll be hell of a tale to tell. Or not!

Dealers Choice Box

7 for $30 13 for $55 25 for $100 or party box of 140 for $500

Too rushed, lazy or fickle to make a decision? Or just don't wanna f**k with the menu? We got you! 

Copyright © 2023 The Dirty Islander - All Rights Reserved.

  • Terms and Conditions

Powered by Limitless Appetites

This website uses cookies.

We use cookies to analyze website traffic and optimize your website experience. By accepting our use of cookies, your data will be aggregated with all other user data.

DeclineAccept